For almost 5 months now I have been living in transition. I have had an unknown future with a complete lack of routine and absolutely no feeling of stability. I have been awash in a whirlwind of confusion and a storm of uncertainty.
It has, in the last weeks, really started to get to me. I'm going more than a little crazy at all the unknowns.
Long term, nothing has happened. My position one year from now is still a mystery to me. Two years, even more so.
But pretty soon, I will be re-entering a place of at least day-to-day consistency. School is starting up for districts around here, and after a while I'm hopeful that I'll start to get some sub calls. That first day will be a terrifying ordeal. The next one, not quite so much. And after nine or ten, I really think I'll either be getting the hang of it or be ready to run screaming. Either way, it won't be an unknown any more.
In addition, my part-time post at a small Catholic school in northern Kentucky will be starting soon. Again, the first day will be a terror for me, but soon after, it will become a known quantity. Some days subbing, some days teaching music...some days, doing nothing at all. But I will have a life of sorts again.
I am going to be a nervous wreck for the next couple weeks, or the next month maybe, until all of this settles into 'normal'. But then it will definitely be time to celebrate. And I will need it by then.
Of course, the other big stuff I keep alluding to is likely going to have something to say about all that...but...one thing at a time. One thing at a time.
Into the breach we go.
Matt
Achtung, Schattenjagers
5 months ago
