There's stress and then there's stress. Sometimes it's a huge major life event, sometimes it's just the sheer magnitude of regular daily things that pile up all at once. We've been riding the waves of the latter.
For me, it's been threefold. Last week I was back to work after spring break - stressful enough...but also frantically trying to pull the pieces together for my first and second grade programs. Assigning parts, learning the final songs, checking to see if kids have learned their lines, planning rehearsals (which under my current schedule means filling up planning and lunch time with more practice) and having nightmares about the shows being a disaster. This week, I was able to scale back on some of the extra rehearsals, but all my afternoons and evenings have been taken up with playing in the pit of the High School's production of "Little Women" which begins tonight. So I've had like ZERO down time, free time, me time. But seriously, how can I complain about that - while I've been sitting in the pit sometimes bored, Steph's been at home with all 4 kids ALL WEEK on her own. She had plenty of family and friend help to get her through but still - it's a long haul when you're the only one there.
So, it's been a rough couple of weeks.
But...today...I think the proverbial corner has been turned, for myself anyway. Not sure if it's the fact that the weather here in Cincy has finally shifted from early spring to late spring and summer is slowly awakening...or the fact that my long days of pit rehearsals are done now, or the fact that as of yesterday, ALL my 1st graders have learned all their lines, but I feel lighter today. Which is amazing to consider when I think that I still have 3 shows to play, still have both of my OWN programs to go through, that I still have to cram 70-80 1st graders into my room this afternoon to practice again, and that there are still about 10 of those first graders who cannot understand why I get angry when they talk to their friends, lay down, run around the room, and push each other during the songs (the look of innocent shock is priceless...even the 4th and 5th time). I still feel better. Amazing. Just goes with my theory that stress is simply your brain on overload - something seems stressful when you've got a lot going on, but then if you suddenly eliminate JUST enough of the other things, the logjam is removed and it doesn't seem so bad. I guess I just got things under that critical mass.
So, still a ways to go to get to the other end of this 3 week crazy train...but I feel better about getting through it now.
Matt
Friday, April 24, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
No apology is forthcoming
Hey, I post when I can. I wish I had the time, energy, writing ability, and self-discipline to keep up on this thing, but I do my best.
Been a while, huh? Well, let's sum up. Robby is crawling. Hannah screams a lot and appears to be thinking about crawling, but would much rather be held all the time. Mari has a double ear infection and we have just realized that at least part of her inability to follow directions is hopefully related to horribly clogged ears. Tubes may be in the future - we don't want that, but if it explains at least some of her behaviors, bring the tubes please. Faith is frighteningly intelligent but would be content to rot her brain watching My Little Pony until her eyes fall out.
If I sound somewhat abrasive, it's because we took the trailer out for a test run over Spring Break. I spent basically 48 hours with various combinations of Faith and Mari, being the sole parent. It rained. We had nowhere to go and we had already been together nonstop for most of a week. We got sick of each other. There was much yelling, frustration, crying, whining, and unhappiness. But we survived and I'm recovering from it...and so are the girls.
In work news, I am WAY behind getting the 2nd and 1st grade plays ready. This is a result of me not yet realizing that if I don't compartmentalize ALL of my life, I simply can not keep up with everything. I'm working on it. I will do better. I could skate by before and everything would still get done and get done well. No more. Pulled in too many directions.
Beyond that, life as normal. Lots of birthdays coming up, and the light of summer is starting to illuminate the tunnel a little bit.
Thanks all for not giving up on us. More...whenever. Don't hold your breath...
Matt
Been a while, huh? Well, let's sum up. Robby is crawling. Hannah screams a lot and appears to be thinking about crawling, but would much rather be held all the time. Mari has a double ear infection and we have just realized that at least part of her inability to follow directions is hopefully related to horribly clogged ears. Tubes may be in the future - we don't want that, but if it explains at least some of her behaviors, bring the tubes please. Faith is frighteningly intelligent but would be content to rot her brain watching My Little Pony until her eyes fall out.
If I sound somewhat abrasive, it's because we took the trailer out for a test run over Spring Break. I spent basically 48 hours with various combinations of Faith and Mari, being the sole parent. It rained. We had nowhere to go and we had already been together nonstop for most of a week. We got sick of each other. There was much yelling, frustration, crying, whining, and unhappiness. But we survived and I'm recovering from it...and so are the girls.
In work news, I am WAY behind getting the 2nd and 1st grade plays ready. This is a result of me not yet realizing that if I don't compartmentalize ALL of my life, I simply can not keep up with everything. I'm working on it. I will do better. I could skate by before and everything would still get done and get done well. No more. Pulled in too many directions.
Beyond that, life as normal. Lots of birthdays coming up, and the light of summer is starting to illuminate the tunnel a little bit.
Thanks all for not giving up on us. More...whenever. Don't hold your breath...
Matt
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Dieting advice
Here's my random unsolicited advice, based on what we've learned from this round of attempting to lose weight:
* Hunger is just a sensation. You don't necessarily have to do anything about it. If you can mentally accept the fact that you are hungry and still get on with your life, that's half the battle.
* Stuff your face with healthy food. I now make ridiculous quantites of vegetables at dinner, just so that I have something to eat a lot of. I also LOVE a good salad bar.
* Recognize your weakest time of day, and if possible, put yourself in a situation where you won't crack. This is a problem for me, because my danger time is late afternoon, and most of the time, I'm cooking dinner then. It's just so easy for me to do a little too much "Quality Control" while I cook. I'm trying to fight it by having my tall glass of Crystal Light handy and just drinking when I'm hungry. It's a poor substitute but it at least gives me an active thing to do when the temptation hits. Back in 2003 and 2004 when I had gotten my weight way down to 190 or so, I solved this problem by working out at the gym during the late afternoon - no danger of snacking there. I don't have that option now, so I need to do the best I can.
* Allow yourself a meal off...and do it often enough that the foods you're missing don't take on a glowing mystical ethereal mythos. It helps keep it real. Cake is just cake (or in my case a giant burrito is just a giant burrito). If you've been sitting around pining for it, for heaven's sake, go eat it and get back on track tomorrow. It helps to be good now knowing that the thing you REALLY want isn't months away.
* Set yourself up a rewards plan and stick to it. Make the first few goals easily attainable, and tougher and tougher and with bigger and better payoffs as you work your way down. And I know they say you shouldn't use food as a reward, but look. Use what will work for you. If the thought of a feast that will make you gain 2 pounds is enough motivation for you to lose 10 pounds...you're still coming out ahead. Be honest with yourself and what will motivate you, and go for it.
* Find a way to exercise consistently, and do it no matter how crazy it seems. We spent the money on a decent treadmill and it's been worth every penny. And I get up before 5 just about every morning because that's the only time when I can absolutely control my environment. No kids, no anything. Just me and that damn treadmill.
* If you're not used to exercising - don't expect much from yourself. You're probably going to have a tough time for a while. Just try to go a little longer every day. Every little bit helps. You'll build muscles and endurance. It might get harder before it gets easier. Don't quit. It's okay that you suck at exercising. Give yourself a chance to get better.
* Let yourself be a little narcissistic - if you start to notice that you actually ARE looking better, or people start to comment that you're losing weight, ENJOY IT!!! We fatties spend our whole lives de-emphasizing physical appearance...but we're allowed to be proud of ourselves when we get a little less grotesque.
I dunno - this is what is working for me. Depending on when you start counting, I've lost about 30 pounds. I've got a long way to go still, but if I can do it at this time in my life, nothing is impossible.
Matt
* Hunger is just a sensation. You don't necessarily have to do anything about it. If you can mentally accept the fact that you are hungry and still get on with your life, that's half the battle.
* Stuff your face with healthy food. I now make ridiculous quantites of vegetables at dinner, just so that I have something to eat a lot of. I also LOVE a good salad bar.
* Recognize your weakest time of day, and if possible, put yourself in a situation where you won't crack. This is a problem for me, because my danger time is late afternoon, and most of the time, I'm cooking dinner then. It's just so easy for me to do a little too much "Quality Control" while I cook. I'm trying to fight it by having my tall glass of Crystal Light handy and just drinking when I'm hungry. It's a poor substitute but it at least gives me an active thing to do when the temptation hits. Back in 2003 and 2004 when I had gotten my weight way down to 190 or so, I solved this problem by working out at the gym during the late afternoon - no danger of snacking there. I don't have that option now, so I need to do the best I can.
* Allow yourself a meal off...and do it often enough that the foods you're missing don't take on a glowing mystical ethereal mythos. It helps keep it real. Cake is just cake (or in my case a giant burrito is just a giant burrito). If you've been sitting around pining for it, for heaven's sake, go eat it and get back on track tomorrow. It helps to be good now knowing that the thing you REALLY want isn't months away.
* Set yourself up a rewards plan and stick to it. Make the first few goals easily attainable, and tougher and tougher and with bigger and better payoffs as you work your way down. And I know they say you shouldn't use food as a reward, but look. Use what will work for you. If the thought of a feast that will make you gain 2 pounds is enough motivation for you to lose 10 pounds...you're still coming out ahead. Be honest with yourself and what will motivate you, and go for it.
* Find a way to exercise consistently, and do it no matter how crazy it seems. We spent the money on a decent treadmill and it's been worth every penny. And I get up before 5 just about every morning because that's the only time when I can absolutely control my environment. No kids, no anything. Just me and that damn treadmill.
* If you're not used to exercising - don't expect much from yourself. You're probably going to have a tough time for a while. Just try to go a little longer every day. Every little bit helps. You'll build muscles and endurance. It might get harder before it gets easier. Don't quit. It's okay that you suck at exercising. Give yourself a chance to get better.
* Let yourself be a little narcissistic - if you start to notice that you actually ARE looking better, or people start to comment that you're losing weight, ENJOY IT!!! We fatties spend our whole lives de-emphasizing physical appearance...but we're allowed to be proud of ourselves when we get a little less grotesque.
I dunno - this is what is working for me. Depending on when you start counting, I've lost about 30 pounds. I've got a long way to go still, but if I can do it at this time in my life, nothing is impossible.
Matt
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Survival Mode
We survived. What a week! Two Wednesdays ago (the 11th), we had Mari in to the pediatrician for what we thought was an ear infection. And she just seemed generally not well. Ped. said her one ear was maybe slightly pink, but nothing too major. Gave us a prescription to fill if she seemed worse in the next few days. Well, by that Fri. night, she seemed miserable so we filled the prescription.
The next day, Saturday, Robby seemed miserable. He woke up just not himself -- quiet, not very active and kinda stared in to space. I was able to get him a rare appt. w/ the ped. that Sat. afternoon. By the appt. time, he had a 102.9 fever. Ugh. Matt brought him back from the appt. saying the ped. found nothing. Absolutely nothing and we should just keep up with the ibuprofen and Tylenol to help the fever. By that evening, Hannah had a fever and was crying a lot.
Sunday, Robby seemed a little better, Hannah not so much better and Mari was better. Fast forward to Tuesday night (Matt's birthday). By then, Hannah had slept poorly 3 nights in a row. She went to bed badly that night, too. Around 10pm, we hear this very weird, scary noise coming from the nursery. It was Robby and I knew that sound very well. It was the croup cough. Faith had had croup about a year and a half ago.
It was so scary to hear a 10 month old cough like that and struggle to breathe like that. Ugh. I spent some time on the phone with the ped. and we decided to wait it out. Spent the night with Robby sleeping on my chest/shoulder so he could be upright and I could be near him.
Got both babies to the ped. the next day. Robby was treated for croup. Hannah, for an ear infection. Ugh. So until Monday, 75% of our kids are on medication. Well, actually "Robby 'Roids" is off his prednizone now, I guess, so just 50%.
I'm so glad we have a quiet weekend planned!
Steph
The next day, Saturday, Robby seemed miserable. He woke up just not himself -- quiet, not very active and kinda stared in to space. I was able to get him a rare appt. w/ the ped. that Sat. afternoon. By the appt. time, he had a 102.9 fever. Ugh. Matt brought him back from the appt. saying the ped. found nothing. Absolutely nothing and we should just keep up with the ibuprofen and Tylenol to help the fever. By that evening, Hannah had a fever and was crying a lot.
Sunday, Robby seemed a little better, Hannah not so much better and Mari was better. Fast forward to Tuesday night (Matt's birthday). By then, Hannah had slept poorly 3 nights in a row. She went to bed badly that night, too. Around 10pm, we hear this very weird, scary noise coming from the nursery. It was Robby and I knew that sound very well. It was the croup cough. Faith had had croup about a year and a half ago.
It was so scary to hear a 10 month old cough like that and struggle to breathe like that. Ugh. I spent some time on the phone with the ped. and we decided to wait it out. Spent the night with Robby sleeping on my chest/shoulder so he could be upright and I could be near him.
Got both babies to the ped. the next day. Robby was treated for croup. Hannah, for an ear infection. Ugh. So until Monday, 75% of our kids are on medication. Well, actually "Robby 'Roids" is off his prednizone now, I guess, so just 50%.
I'm so glad we have a quiet weekend planned!
Steph
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Time power-walks on
Been on the treadmill for 15 straight mornings now. Not gonna say any more about it because that's some pretty dull information to read about.
We are into the grind season at work. Snow days are over, no long weekend days on the horizon - it's almost like having a 'real job' for a while. But not really...
Faith is in her 3rd week of having a chores and behavior chart. It's working well. She's really excited about getting good marks and is doing a better job of helping out around the house. And she's gotten 2 allowances so far, and it excited about that. This system is helping us do a better job of using positive reinforcement with her, and it's also starting her learning about the value of money as well as the idea of saving. It's hard to remember to update the chart every day, but even if we sometimes aren't quite up-to-date, we're always talking about it and she's more aware. And honestly, I think she's probably not behaving a whole lot differently than she was before, but it's helped us all frame her behavior in a more positive light.
Mari doesn't have an allowance yet but we are making her a chart, too. We've kind of dropped the ball on that one, but I wanted to take a week or so to observe what stuff we really want to focus on with her. I think I have a good idea and hopefully I can type it up here in a few minutes. She's doing generally well - she has her tough moments and talks back more than we'd like, but she's starting to realize right away when she does it - you can see her get an immediate worried look on her face, so hopefully that will progress to being able to control her impulses - which will I think always be the challenge with her.
More on the twins next time - no bad news to report anyway.
Thanks for reading,
Matt
We are into the grind season at work. Snow days are over, no long weekend days on the horizon - it's almost like having a 'real job' for a while. But not really...
Faith is in her 3rd week of having a chores and behavior chart. It's working well. She's really excited about getting good marks and is doing a better job of helping out around the house. And she's gotten 2 allowances so far, and it excited about that. This system is helping us do a better job of using positive reinforcement with her, and it's also starting her learning about the value of money as well as the idea of saving. It's hard to remember to update the chart every day, but even if we sometimes aren't quite up-to-date, we're always talking about it and she's more aware. And honestly, I think she's probably not behaving a whole lot differently than she was before, but it's helped us all frame her behavior in a more positive light.
Mari doesn't have an allowance yet but we are making her a chart, too. We've kind of dropped the ball on that one, but I wanted to take a week or so to observe what stuff we really want to focus on with her. I think I have a good idea and hopefully I can type it up here in a few minutes. She's doing generally well - she has her tough moments and talks back more than we'd like, but she's starting to realize right away when she does it - you can see her get an immediate worried look on her face, so hopefully that will progress to being able to control her impulses - which will I think always be the challenge with her.
More on the twins next time - no bad news to report anyway.
Thanks for reading,
Matt
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Jogging on Purpose?
Um, I just jogged on purpose, really for the first time EVER in my life without anyone telling me too. I have memories of being in elementary school and our gym teacher Mr. Baggot (yes, his name got made fun of pretty big time) making us "Run the Mile". I was ALWAYS dead last and ALWAYS walked most of it. I was one of the only kids who didn't get that stupid (and yes I'm reverting back to elementary behavior here) Presidential Fitness award.
Since getting the treadmill on February 18, I have only missed one morning of using it (the night before, Faith had, let's just say, major stomach issues of several types and we had been up quite a bit). Today was the 3rd day in a row that I used one of the 16 pre-installed programs. It's set for 30 mins and I made it 20 mins (the last 10 I kinda set my own, easier incline and speed). But the last 2 of those 20 I had to jog. It was a weird sensation. Hm.
Matt told me yesterday that he's lost about 20 lbs now. Pretty amazing. And I can tell by looking at him now. Pretty cool.
Kids are all doing well. We go Thurs. night for Faith's kindergarten registration. I have very very mixed emotions about this, which I'm sure I'll share more of at a later date. Mari's crazy and fun as ever. She still LOVES preschool and music class. The babies are well, too. They are getting so big -- a few weeks ago at their 9 mo. physical, they were about 21 lbs ea. Hannah's about 4 oz heavier than Robby but is an inch shorter. She's got an adorably fat little belly. Robby is "THIS" close to pulling himself up.
That's all for now. Steph
Since getting the treadmill on February 18, I have only missed one morning of using it (the night before, Faith had, let's just say, major stomach issues of several types and we had been up quite a bit). Today was the 3rd day in a row that I used one of the 16 pre-installed programs. It's set for 30 mins and I made it 20 mins (the last 10 I kinda set my own, easier incline and speed). But the last 2 of those 20 I had to jog. It was a weird sensation. Hm.
Matt told me yesterday that he's lost about 20 lbs now. Pretty amazing. And I can tell by looking at him now. Pretty cool.
Kids are all doing well. We go Thurs. night for Faith's kindergarten registration. I have very very mixed emotions about this, which I'm sure I'll share more of at a later date. Mari's crazy and fun as ever. She still LOVES preschool and music class. The babies are well, too. They are getting so big -- a few weeks ago at their 9 mo. physical, they were about 21 lbs ea. Hannah's about 4 oz heavier than Robby but is an inch shorter. She's got an adorably fat little belly. Robby is "THIS" close to pulling himself up.
That's all for now. Steph
Sunday, February 22, 2009
So Inclined
Quick update - been on the treadmill for 30 minutes for 4 days straight. Hooray for me. Had to go out and buy some new shoes after Steph pointed out that my heel was bleeding after working out. The new scale we bought is working out great as well - much more consistent than the junky old model we had before. Feeling pretty good about the progress we're making.
Keep wishing us good luck and good health!
Matt
Keep wishing us good luck and good health!
Matt
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Do Tread on Me
We bought a treadmill. Used it for the first time today. Made it to 22 minutes on one of the pre-programmed routines. The only time I have to do it without giving up further family time is to get up at 5am. Which honestly isn't that bad, I'm usually up anyway, but there's a big difference between lying in bed awake and speed-walking on a treadmill awake. My energy level the rest of the day will be interesting.
We've been eating better, attempting to lose weight and be more healthy, so this is just the next step. Way back in the day (before kids and between jobs) I worked out every day and was doing like 45 minutes on the elliptical consistently. I also weighed about 55 pounds less than I do now. I've lost about 10 pounds already this time around.
Anyway, I am going to attempt to add a minute a day until I can complete the 30-minute routines. Then we'll hold steady there for a while until it feels normal and then try to up it a little more. The thing about me is, all things being equal I am a fat lazy slob, but once I'm in the middle of this kind of project, I can be a machine. I'm the guy who'll hurt myself doing too much.
So, expect weight and endurance updates on the blog as well.
I also am really hoping to get back to posting videos to YouTube - my problems with the Moody Blues notwithstanding. Luckily, no one else has seen me as a threat and demanded my insidious videos be removed, so I don't anticipate any further problems.
Also added a link to the Towners' blog - check it out!
Matt
We've been eating better, attempting to lose weight and be more healthy, so this is just the next step. Way back in the day (before kids and between jobs) I worked out every day and was doing like 45 minutes on the elliptical consistently. I also weighed about 55 pounds less than I do now. I've lost about 10 pounds already this time around.
Anyway, I am going to attempt to add a minute a day until I can complete the 30-minute routines. Then we'll hold steady there for a while until it feels normal and then try to up it a little more. The thing about me is, all things being equal I am a fat lazy slob, but once I'm in the middle of this kind of project, I can be a machine. I'm the guy who'll hurt myself doing too much.
So, expect weight and endurance updates on the blog as well.
I also am really hoping to get back to posting videos to YouTube - my problems with the Moody Blues notwithstanding. Luckily, no one else has seen me as a threat and demanded my insidious videos be removed, so I don't anticipate any further problems.
Also added a link to the Towners' blog - check it out!
Matt
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Weekly Update
Here I am at conferences again - no weather to report this time.
Normally I'd be hardcore working on vides right now, but I am feeling incredibly lethargic right now and can't seem to motivate myself to do anything. Been a long week. I am hoping that I can drag myself over to the laptop at some point soon to get a LITTLE something done.
Hannah finally got her first tooth. Robby already has 4. Their hair is also starting to really come in well - nothing like Faith and Mari had but enough that it makes them look a little different. Neither shows any sign of crawling or walking. Robby loves to stand - if we can help him practice he'll cruise soon. Hannah may sit for her entire life. She has a remarkable range of motion from the sitting position. She can flatten herself out on the floor to reach something and then prop herself back up. Meanwhile Robby can roll anywhere in a room within a matter of seconds. They've both started Kindermusik classes and are having a great time.
Mari is doing fabulously in preschool. She continues to absolutely adore the twins. She's also gotten a lot better about being calm and not loving them to the point of injury. She's also learned how to backtalk to her parents which is not so good. She still will give us Tookie face from time to time, and still loves to play dressup more than anything in the world.
Faith is also doing great in preschool, and is apparently well out of her shell there. She is reading chapter books at home, and doing so obsessively. She can't go from one room to another without carrying a stack of them around with her. She asks us what unfamiliar words are and remembers them well. While we're a little sad that she'll be going to Kindergarten in the fall, we're happy that she'll be somewhere where she can hopefully be a little more challenged.
All is well in the family. Snow days are behind us, the springtime grind lies ahead. Summer is starting to hover on the edges of our awareness. A return to the Beach after a 3-year absence, another epic RV adventure. Thanks be to God for all he has blessed us with.
Matt
Normally I'd be hardcore working on vides right now, but I am feeling incredibly lethargic right now and can't seem to motivate myself to do anything. Been a long week. I am hoping that I can drag myself over to the laptop at some point soon to get a LITTLE something done.
Hannah finally got her first tooth. Robby already has 4. Their hair is also starting to really come in well - nothing like Faith and Mari had but enough that it makes them look a little different. Neither shows any sign of crawling or walking. Robby loves to stand - if we can help him practice he'll cruise soon. Hannah may sit for her entire life. She has a remarkable range of motion from the sitting position. She can flatten herself out on the floor to reach something and then prop herself back up. Meanwhile Robby can roll anywhere in a room within a matter of seconds. They've both started Kindermusik classes and are having a great time.
Mari is doing fabulously in preschool. She continues to absolutely adore the twins. She's also gotten a lot better about being calm and not loving them to the point of injury. She's also learned how to backtalk to her parents which is not so good. She still will give us Tookie face from time to time, and still loves to play dressup more than anything in the world.
Faith is also doing great in preschool, and is apparently well out of her shell there. She is reading chapter books at home, and doing so obsessively. She can't go from one room to another without carrying a stack of them around with her. She asks us what unfamiliar words are and remembers them well. While we're a little sad that she'll be going to Kindergarten in the fall, we're happy that she'll be somewhere where she can hopefully be a little more challenged.
All is well in the family. Snow days are behind us, the springtime grind lies ahead. Summer is starting to hover on the edges of our awareness. A return to the Beach after a 3-year absence, another epic RV adventure. Thanks be to God for all he has blessed us with.
Matt
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